I've been a complete absentee blogger and usually when I return, this is the part where I lay out an apology and explanation of why I've been away followed by a promise to do better. But as I sit here enjoying my fruit salad consisting of out of season strawberries, seedless red grapes & surprisingly sweet blackberries, I'm not so inclined to include any of the above. Well, except maybe a slight explanation--but it's more like an update.
First, let me say that I'm a person of celebration. I like to celebrate birthdays and holidays and any other monumental/defining moment in not only my own life but for those of my loved ones and even my blog friends. My birthday recently passed and I barely mentioned it anywhere online and I absolutely neglected my usual post in honor of my birthday (on purpose). And not because I didn't want to acknowledge my birthday but simply because I couldn't mention my birthday or any great occasion without being tempted to mention this:
Chief and I decided when MJ was around a year old that we would not be having another child--we were SO absolute about it. About a year later, I'd changed my mind because I didn't want my baby growing up alone. Still adamant, Chief didn't want another and after many conversations about it, I'd resigned and gave it up to God because only He has the power to change a man's heart. (Proverbs 21:1 -- The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD; he directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases.)
Nearly a year later, on September 23rd, at the end of an awesome and touching church service, Chief leaned over to me as our Pastor began the benediction.
"We should have another baby."
"Shut up! Uh uh! For real?!"
Never mind my surprise, but I knew that it was God that had changed his stubborn heart. And later in conversation over brunch, he admitted that it was something that the Pastor said that hit him hard. Therein was my confirmation that God had done the work on my husband for me.
This might all sound cheesy to some but I'm a firm believer that God has the ability to change hearts & lives. I also believe that God's timing is perfect and infinitely superior to my own. This is a constant, reassuring lesson for me that when I open myself up and surrender to God's will for my life no matter the circumstance instead of trying to handle things on my own, he really does come through EVERY SINGLE TIME--right on time.
As it stands on 12/12/12, I am 12 weeks into my second pregnancy. We found out at a mere four weeks on October 17 (my mom's birthday) and then on October 31 (my birthday) we had our first sonogram. At that stage, all there was to see was a little bean with a heartbeat but it was absolute proof of life. So you see, I was bursting at the seams and I had to stay away because I wasn't ready to share and I didn't want to slip up or give stupid little hints.
Doing the math, our child was conceived shortly after September 23rd. Again, God's own perfect timing because it was meant to happen when He wanted it to.
This was one of my "31 things" but I surely intended it to happen next year just before the challenge ended. Well, you know what this means. I'll have to make a revision to that list. Coming soon